I can’t believe how the clocks changing causes me so much confusion. It’s happened every year of my life so I should be used to it by now and an hour doesn’t really make that much difference, does it?
This time of year however does make me reminisce, how 5 years ago that hour made a huge difference. You see, after years of waiting I was finally in the process of IVF treatment & the day the clocks changed was the day of my third, time specific IVF injection.
The first injection was done in the comfort of the clinic, under the caring, watchful eye of an IVF nurse. She told me how to fill and position the needle as well as the best place to inject. I had asked her every question under the sun, apart from of course, what should I do when the clocks change.
I remember it was Sunday night & I was ready at 7pm, the specified time to inject but it wasn’t really 7 anymore was it? To make matters worse the doorbell kept going with Trick or Treaters, celebrating Halloween. Oh the irony of getting irritated by other people’s children when I was so desperate for my own. To be fair I haven’t changed much I’m still often irritated by other people’s children & if I’m completely honest as much as I love them, I occasionally get a little annoyed with my own.
That Sunday night the needle was poised and the decision had to be made. The clinic was closed so we weren’t able to call and ask. To say IVF treatment can be overwhelming is an understatement. I found myself clinging on to expert advice, rules and hope. When you reach grey areas like this, it’s bleak and frightening.
After what seemed like hours but was indeed only 15 minures we decided to split the difference over 3 days and inject at 20 past. To quote De La Soul “3 is the magic number” and at the time I was incredibly superstitious, chatting to single magpies in great length, in the hope that another would hop along to keep it company. It’s 2 for joy right? And joy meant a successful ICSI cycle & a baby.
Anyway it worked, the 20 minutes delay bit, I would never reccomend fraternising with magpies. Not now anyway. 10 months later, Isabella arrived, feisty, gorgeous and more than a little unruly. She’s my dream come true & then some.
And that’s not the only thing that makes me smile about this time of year. After enjoying almost 6 delicious months with Isabella I found out I was pregnant again, this time without the help of ICSI. Of course I didn’t believe it until my gorgeous, screaming 100% organic baby turned up in October 2010 ironically almost 2 years to the date after my first IVF injection.
So this weekend we get to celebrate Jemima, my youngest’s daughter 3rd birthday. In the challenging days of endless back chat, paddys and general unreasonable behaviour from a 2 and 4 year old, I sometimes mentally kick myself up the backside, stop and think how lucky I am. This time 5 years ago I was childless, I’d suffered miscarriage & had put all the hope I had into IVF. Back then my life was tense, I was constantly counting down the minutes to the next injection time or number of days until the next scan.
Be careful what you wish for because happily it may just come true. How different is my life now? Isabella, my IVF miracle is only just 4 and started school in September. Her social life has taken off with astonishing speed and as well as the usual play dates, swimming, dance, music lessons, this week she goes to her first school disco. Yes really. I’m thinking I’m possibly better off escorting her. If her Dad goes as her “plus one”, I fear any 4 year old boy who’s brave enough to ask her to dance may get an ear full.
Without a doubt though The big event of the week is of course Jemima turning 3. How did we get here? And more importantly how did we get her? So many well meaning people say natural pregnancy happens a lot after IVF. But I think the odds can be extraorindarily slim and we are beyond lucky to have Jemima. She personifies her existence, charming people with her calm, gentle nature and obscene prettiness then when something means a lot to her she will fight for it against all odds. She’s organic by nature but a ferocious force when necessary.
So happily this week is also full of Peppa Pig Cakes, Pass The Parcel, Parties, Play Centres, Pink balloons and a trip to the Safari park. There are so many ways we are going to make Jemima feel happy, special & loved. Besides it is only appropriate to celebrate Jemima’s birthday in so many ways, as we are celebrating her life for more reason than one.